When Is It No Longer Safe To Be A Man In America?

In a world of climate change, I am beginning to wonder, is chivalry safe anymore?  I’m not talking about Climate change of our environment and gases and ozone of our atmosphere but instead this lingering stench in the air that I see when women want chivalry, yet when it happens, chivalry comes at a fault.

(Image Source: https://www.theguardian.com/money/blog/2008/sep/09/workandcareers)

Once upon a time, it was just smart to not be in rooms alone with women who were not your wives.  It was a respect held for your loved to one to have no mistake about what did NOT happen when in that space alone.

Once upon a time, it was just “the right thing to do” to stop and help someone stranded with a flat tire. Now we have people accused of rape or even worse, and not always coming out true.

Once upon a Time, if you found a woman who appeared intoxicated or under the influence, it was just the right thing to do to walk them home safely or give them a ride to ensure they do in fact get home safely.

Why in the climate of chivalry has this concept become so distorted that a good person had to be questioned for just being a good person anymore?

Why do I need to get a phone call from a loved one saying a woman with torn clothes has been found and please come to help and what do they do?  Call the police and I am on my way.  You never want a man who finds a woman to feel placed in the wrong position and become a falsely accused person, no implications warranted.

Yes the offenses really do happen.  Sadly, the wild and out there scenarios are far more rare than actually spoken about.  We have become a society that speaks on abuse and harm as though it needs a spot light.  It’s true.  It needs a spotlight of attention.

But when is too much, actually TOO MUCH?

I think we need to shine a light not just on actual crime but at the level of community climate where every man or boy becomes fair game for trying to be a nice guy.

Scenario:  a woman tuns up to a man saying please help me, I have to walk home, but there’s this guy (she points to him in the distance). You as a generous person say where do you live so we can get you there safely?  She says just down the road about a mile.  You offer to walk her home since it’s on the way home to your house anyway, even though she doesn’t know that.  Halfway down the road it becomes obvious she seems drunk or under the influence. Whoa there buddy?  She starts talking funny, so you look at the clock and realize this is taking longer than it should and you really have to get back home.  You call your wife and let her know where you are and let her know what is going on.  You and her agree just hurry up and get home.

You get her outside of a home that she says is next to hers, offer to walk her to the door and she offers you to come in to use the restroom.  You kindly decline and say oh no thats okay Im just up this way a ways and I am okay, glad you got home safe.  You turn around and she tries to offer sexual advances.  You decline say whoa not thanks, I am married and O better get home.

You leave and go home.  You later find out this woman actually followed you home.  She is found by the neighbor naked on their front lawn, what do you do?  You tell the neighbor to call the police, right?

Something must be wrong, so you think.  The woman is taken to the hospital for safety checks and she is not only incoherent but clearly under the influence of something.  Did she have sex with anyone? well she doesn’t remember.  But you KNOW you did not touch her beyond any stumbles she may have had while trying to walk and you prevented her from falling.  You offer your DNA just to clear the air.  Staff declines.

What would the logic be if you are this man?  I have friends who have had this happen however under different circumstances. Served with DNA warrants later down the road.  If you were a black man in America, the common stigma would enrage the law enforcement officers to arrest and detain and ask questions later.

In America, Should it be this way? Accuse or be accusatory in action and potentially be entered into a rape database without your knowledge.  The inquiries alone would surmise that a man suspected may be looked at later on in his life for rape in the future.  He could be a monogamous man, happily married, happily exclusive, but he is still in the database.  Should that be allowed to remain in a rape database?

When is codification of male dna no longer a protection for women but a weapon against men?

When do we justify databases  to a point where we no longer have good men, but all men are eventually entered into a database “just in case”?  Is this gynocentrism taking power over men by cataloguing all men?  Is the rape database of the future then a possible option for child support cases? Will the database of suspected men become a weapon for legitimate civil matters of non criminal nature ?

The possibilities are endless for the future of our nation and sadly, I see this is where I see things going for our sons and grandsons.  Our sons and grandsons will all be genetically codified.  Why worry about Ancestry DNA anymore when the likeliness is for all men, if you ever gave a sample, you are already in this codified database, some day, somewhere and it does not exclude non offenders.

Is this really overreaching in the world of yes means yes or hashtag me toos?  Not really.  For women like myself, I worry for the future of my grandchildren, the world we create and leave for them and to what extent is our political climate actually embracing Orwellian and Nazi practices.  Think about that the next time you teach your sons to walk anyone home.  Sorry, I have seen it all so far.  I won’t be teaching anyone to walk anyone else home.  

This isn’t paranoia.  This is very much a reality for men today.  Pussy hat marched demonizing men, convicted female rapists who stand in pride in DC marches attacking the power they wish to seize and inflict upon all man, actually proud of harming men altogether.  Are we women of today really going to subrogate our children into this life where violence is justified, false accusations are being promulgated against our exes for sheer laughter, shits and giggles? Oh we got them, they never saw it coming, oh I got payback, etc etc etc.

I have seen some rather horrid situations unfold, almost every one of them later vindicated and yet the damage was already done.  Peoples lives become stained with press articles, news press releases and very few of them end up with proper exonerating need worthy information.  The assassination of lives has already taken place.  

As a woman or man, mother or father, daughter or son, brother or sister, how much is your livelihood worth?  How quickly do you think one accusation could flip that world upside down?  How much is your life worth to exercise one moment of chivalry, one moment to be the right person in the right place at the right time for someone who needs help?  Humanity dictates chivalry should survive.  But in America, let me say this.  Radical feminism has perverted chivalry and I firmly have to state chivalry, true chivalry, is a dying breed and is blatantly under attack.  Nothing is left undisturbed.  We’re tossing each others lives into the hands of those who choose to codify the common man for malicious and nefarious reasons.

This doesn’t sound like America anymore.  This sounds like Nazi Germany.

A man is codified, a woman is suspicious, a child must be tainted, and the elderly must be harvested away in private communities where no one else can bother them or have to provide for them in their dying days.  If there is no one left to cast away, then we as Americans are all castaways.

Where do your values stand?  I have to admit, we are all guilty of making chivalrous failures, including myself.  I no longer stop to help someone with a flat.  Instead I call highway services to go help them.  I have roadside service to avoid “stranger danger” because I am guilty of it too.  We are all guilty of the abrogation and failures of chivalry.  Good, bad, black, white, indifferent...

What are you guilty of in the name of chivalry?  How do I teach my children that sometimes we have to ignore doing the right thing when that is literally what I am all about?  Is it safe anymore to do the right thing?  Most of the time, I declare that anyone who really pays attention would realize that chivalry is not dead but dying a very hard fast death in America.  We are all responsible.